Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Paperwork and driving

I'm shocked and amazed that the Internet is allowing me to do things right now. I am able to post and actually able to upload photos-- way cool-- give Laila a break-- thanks Lai!!

Anyway, today has been a long day full of paperwork and driving. We literally spent the whole day driving. Because they are shortening our trip because of Chinese New Year there are a few things that we had to hand carry and Fushun, the city the orphanage is in, is far away and traffic made it even worse. Literally, we spent most of the day in the car but Finley did amazing!! She has amazingly attached to Kevin!!! Even last night, our guide had to come back to get some paperwork signed and we both were very worried about Finley seeing her because we worried she would reattach to Maggie and that all the progress she had made with Kevin would be gone. BUT, we did see Maggie and Finley wanted nothing to do with her. She answered her questions and spoke to her a bit, but she was firmly attached to Kevin and had no interest in shifting that to Maggie. We both are so thankful for the amazing bond between the two of them-- now as for me-- I'm not quite so well received :( At this point it is safe to say that she wants pretty much nothing to do with me. In my comments from yesterday one mom mentioned that she was merely a lowly assistant to her husband and I am fitting that role to a tee!!! She will give me her used gum and trash and here and there I am lucky enough to help her go to the bathroom, but other than that, I am invisible. It was funny, Kevin and Finley were sitting on the couch in our room a few minutes ago and I gave her a cashew and she liked it so I got more and sat next to her to give them to her. She immediately gave me a mean look and grabbed Kevin's hand and jumped in his lap and would not even look at me. It was funny and sad at the same time. As much as it makes me sad that she wants nothing to do with me, it also makes me soooooo happy that she finds comfort in Kevin. That is a true blessing and I cant imagine if she did not find comfort in one of us-- that would be horrible. I know she will come around eventually. I do hope it is sometime on this trip that she decides I'm ok because that would be hard to be shunned the whole trip-- but I am ok if that happens-- she WILL come around :)

OK, so what do we know about our little Finley right now.

1. She is a jabber jaws-- she just jabbers constantly in Chinese telling Kevin all about everything and we smile and repeat what she says. According to Maggie, she is saying a ton of full sentences and makes full sense. Maggie says her language is amazing for her age-- I'm so pleased and that is a wonderful indicator that her English will come quick.

2. She is neat and orderly-- She loves everything to have it's place and she makes us laugh as she is better at organization than we are.

3. She loves bubbles and has the cutest giggle you have ever heard. Her favorite thing is to play bubbles with kev-- or look out the window with Kev and tell him all about what she sees.

4. She is very independent and will tell you if she needs to pee or poo and then lead you with her to the toilet.

5. She has wild hair-- it is not the texture of Mia's rather is has a curl right on top and makes for styling very difficult. It has a ton of body so I think once it is long and the weight of it pulls it down then it will be easier. For now-- styling is a challenge to say the least.

6. She will need a scar revision- The scar on her bum is fine but there is a very large collection of fat-- really just jiggly fat-- that has made a huge bump above her scar. It will need to be removed as it is very large and totally in the way for clothes and even just comfort. She has not expressed any discomfort but as large as it is, it has to be in the way-- so we will get a revision as soon as we are allowed.

7. She has a very compliant and sweet personality. She is just a sweet little girl who wants to help. Everyone is impressed with her compliance- they are also impressed with how well she is attached to Kevin.

8. Kevin would like to add that Finley is ridiculously cute--- in his own words!!! I agree!!

9. She will say things in English if you tell her to repeat. Maggie told her to say the things we were pointing to in English and she would repeat. She did a great job and her pronunciation was great!!! English is going to come very fast I am sure!

10. Her fine motor and gross motor is great! She has amazing chop stick skills and can color in the lines very well. Fine motor is amazing for her age and gross seems spot on as well!

11. She is Kevin's shadow and even if he gets up to walk 2 feet away, she will get up and walk with him.

Other than that, she is doing great. She slept from about 7:15pm to 6am this morning and I just woke her up one time to pee-- woke up totally dry-- yaaa!!!!

At the grocery store yesterday

She is chewing on a balloon that Kevin gave to her

Dinner last night. Chop stick skills are amazing and we were told that kids in China do not start eating with chopsticks until they are about 8, so Finley is doing great!!!

Showing her skills.

All bundled to go back outside

Sleeping sound! She sucks her two middle fingers to fall asleep-- too cute!!

Breakfast this morning along side her favorite person on earth

Finalizing the adoption. We had to do a thumb print for each signature

Kevin and his print

The paperwork

Finley had to to her hand print-- she was not sure what to think of it

But she did fine and put the print where it needed to be

Love that look

Attempting to smile

We had to apply for her passport in Fushun which was a horribly long drive in traffic both ways. They are having to expedite the passport for us because of Chinese New Year

This was pretty much the picture for the passport but they photo shopped her pigtails out because her hair had to be "plain". It is a funny picture

Pointing to the camera. You can see she has a little bump on her head and a few on her nose area. It is a virus that I guess takes 6 months to a year to go away. My friend whose daughter also had these (which I guess they are very common her and in the US) is looking up a homeopathic remedy she says works much faster. She also has a bruise-- not sure what from.

Falling asleep on daddy on the way home from Fushun.

Tomorrow we head to the airport at 10:30 and fly out at 1pm and arrive in Guangzhou at 5pm. I cant wait to meet so many of my friends from RQ in GZ!!! YAAA!!!

Kids we miss you so much. I miss you a ton and want a big hug and kiss from all of you. We got back to our hotel too late today to call - it was midnight your time when we finally got home so we are sorry we could not call but we will tomorrow. We love and miss you so much-- the trip is now half over-- be home soon!!!


  1. I second Kevin...AMAZINGLY cute!!! From one rejected Mom to another...I hear ya! I know EXACTLY what you are saying...I hope Guangzhou has the same effect on Finely..Magic Air! He still loves his Daddy best...but I'm not as offensive anymore :) See ya tomorrow!!

  2. What a cutie!!! She looks like she is adjusting well. And you get to finish up early!! Lucky you. I'm sure you'll be glad to get home and begin adjusting to your new "normal".

  3. Wow Christy! I just can't wait to get up in the morning and see how things are going! Finley is ridiculously cute! What a little trooper she is! Our daughter was the exact opposite and totally glued to me and pretty much shunned my husband until after we were home. He never once got to hold her in China. He was like the lowly servant you spoke of. However, now she is totally in love with Daddy and can't ever wait for him to get home from work!
    Your trip is speeding by, enjoy it! God Bless -Joy

  4. Great pictures. She is adorable. You know that bump? My son had a couple shortly after coming home and I had a real problem with the school nurse thinking that he had something contagious. I would recommend that you have your doctor look at them and write a letter clearing her for contact with other kids when you get home just to be safe.

    My best,

  5. What great pictures despite an incredibly long day! What a trooper Miss Finley is! Praying that she begins to open her heart to you more as I am sure it is difficult at times feel "invisible." I know it will happen and I am praying that you see a little progress each day!

    Enjoy your time in Guangzhou! You are in the homestretch now!

  6. She is adorable & sounds like a very smart little girl! We were in Shenyang for 9 days! You are very blessed to be able to move on to Guangzhou. Shenyang was nice, but after 9 days it is hard to find things to do. We had the same experience with our son. He attached to my husband & wanted NOTHING to do with me. I cried a lot. You are handling it much better. Our son was letting me hold him after about 4-5 days. Now I am his favorite.

  7. I am guessing you are new parent's. I do need to address the photo of your daughter chewing on a balloon. Please know this is a very serious choking hazard for children. VERY serious.

    Please take a moment to read this when you are home.

  8. Oh, you are so right... she is ridiculously cute. And, I don't know why, but that pic of her falling asleep on her daddy with his coat around her, just made me tear up :-) Soooo sweet!
    Praying for continued progress on the attachment front.
    Blessings to you all.

  9. So so So cute!! Hope the flight goes well. My son sucks his two middle fingers too. Bad news is he is 6.5 yrs old and still does it!

  10. She is insanely cute! congrats. Hope the rest of your journey goes well. It seems as if they did a great job preparing her for the transition!

  11. What a cutie-pie!

    We have adopted from China twice. Our first daughter wanted nothing to do with DH and would cry loudly if he even looked at her. It took many many months for her to really accept him.

    Our second daughter wanted very little to do with me. Save all the fun things for you to do with her-- she likes bubbles-- you keep the bubbles etc.

    She will come around. Once we were home from China and DH went back to work-- our youngest started to come around. Plus, they see how much your other kids love you--that helps as well.

    She IS so cute!

    Reena-- a blog lurker from RQ

  12. What a cutie-pie!

    We have adopted from China twice. Our first daughter wanted nothing to do with DH and would cry loudly if he even looked at her. It took many many months for her to really accept him.

    Our second daughter wanted very little to do with me. Save all the fun things for you to do with her-- she likes bubbles-- you keep the bubbles etc.

    She will come around. Once we were home from China and DH went back to work-- our youngest started to come around. Plus, they see how much your other kids love you--that helps as well.

    She IS so cute!

    Reena-- a blog lurker from RQ

  13. Praying for you guys! She is Beautiful & sucks her fingers JUST like Lilianna! Tough habit to break. We can't wait until you get home!

  14. Christy...that last picture just melts the heart!! He is so right...ridiculously cute!! I just can't get enough of her. Wesleigh didn't decide Richard was ok until we were in our house after that VERY long travel day! I'm thinking I might be ok if this next one attaches to Richard first ;) (I'm sure I will change my mind about that, though!) Glad she is doing so well!!

  15. My boys are adopted from Korea and my youngest wanted NOTHING to do with me. He would go to my husband, my sister (which made me cry) but not to me. I realized to him I was the one replacing his foster mother and the did not like me for that reason. You had said she was very close to her nanny and to her you are replacing her. Your husband is correct..she is CUTE!!!
    I can not wait to see her with her brothers and sister:)

  16. Toooo cute..
    Sounds like things are going well.

  17. Christy! You know you have all of your RQ friends supporting you. She is just precious and does look so cute in Daddy's arms. But soon I know she will be her Mama's girls.
    On another topic, is she the size you thought she might be? What size clothes is she wearing? Our little one I believe will be similar in size.
    Vicki (Redlands)

  18. Hi Christy, I'm another RQ mom from So Cal and mom of daughter from Shen yang. My dd did the same thing with dad. Try to be the only one who offers food. After a day or 2 insist she look at you first, then give food. She will start to look at you a go from there. I have similar blond hair, and I think that is what freaks them out. My daughter has the same hair as finley. We can talk when you get back. Hang in there, my daughter wants no one but me now. (She is also 3 and been with us now since 18 mths.) It will happen.


  19. I fondly remember hanging out with the dads in our travel group, who's daughters would have nothing to do with us. We would hang behind our spouses holding the diaper bags, strollers, juggling sippy cups and Cherrios. It was a bittersweet time as I was so glad she was attaching to SOMEONE, just that someone wasn't me. If I held her she would look for the nearest Chinese woman and open her arms for them to take her. My husband was amazing in China with his little girl. A guy who was raised with a brother and has two sons, with a little girl strapped to his chest for two weeks straight, it was an incredibly beautiful sight. Hang in there....she will slowly let you in.

  20. (Came upon your blog via RQ). You have an adorable daughter! Just wanted to mention the "virus" bumps on her face. If they are molluscum (if you know) one trick my GP gave me when my kids caught them from some friends is to put nail polish on them! Otherwise, if they scratch them off, it spreads and is very contagious, and take many, many months to go away. The prescription alternative has all kinds of horrible warnings on it.

  21. Oh yes, I remember all too well what you are experiencing. When we were in China, our DD also didn't like me very much. I was allowed to hand her things and do her hair, but that was about it. Fortunately, things got much better when we were in GZ. I hope it is better for you as well. Also, one of my sons had the same skin issue. It was a major pain, but gradually cleared.
    Good luck with the rest of your trip!

  22. Christy~ Finley is gorgeous! So, so cute! but I'm sure you already know that :-)

    Rejection of mom is so common, G did that some even after we came home. She's a total mama's girl now as you know. It was hard for me to take sometimes though.

    Hugs, susan

  23. Christy, I've been following along on your trip to Finley and have enjoyed every minute! We connected on RQ after I noticed your daughter Mia had the same finding spot as my new son Samuel. I just read the part about Finley's skin and realized that 2 of my kids haev the same thing. One had it when coming home fmro China and apparently shared it with one of his new siblings. :P I would LOVE to hear abou that homeopathic remedy if your friend shares it with you!